New Enemy, Old Game
by NUTCASE71733
Summary: Dr. Eggman tries to think up a new plan when he remembers a story he heard of a speedy creature living in the Arizona desert. Crossover with Loony Toons, Oneshot.


This is a story I put up on deviantart, but I decided to bring it over here for the Sonic fans to enjoy. This story was the result of watching too many Road Runner cartoons on YouTube as well as my love of the Sonic series.

For the purposes of this story, I portrayed the two sides of the argument over the plot devices seen in the series. I have no prefrence over what is used plot-wise to be honest, but I've found the recent plots to be more in depth than what was done in the early games. Especially since there has hardly been any character development for the original characters as opposed to some of the newer characters released in the past eight to ten years.

I own nothing. Sonic and all other characters are property of SEGA. Wiley Coyote and the Road Runner are owned by Warner Bros.

* * *

The nefarious Dr. Eggman was sitting on his metal throne in his secret base, plotting his next move against Sonic the Hedgehog as well as his next plan at world domination. For several years, his plans backfired with near-cataclysmic results.

First was Chaos, a water demon who was the gaurdian deity for the Chao race who decieved Eggman into thinking he was an obediant and simple-minded beast.

Next was the Biolizard, which was the prototype of the ultimate life form created by Eggman's grandfather, Professor Gerald. The Biolizard was released after fifty years of hibernation and was about to destroy the Earth if it was not for the efforts of Sonic the Hedgehog, and the supperior version of the ultimate life form known as Shadow the Hedgehog.

The next thing that happened was one of Eggman's own robots turned on him. This one was actually the most powerful and menacing of all his robot servents, Metal Sonic; A blood-thirsty, mechanical version of Sonic created for the sole purpose of destroying Sonic in the most painful way possible.

After an interplanetary war against an evil race of aliens called the Black Arms, Eggman found a strange robot which according to ancient lore was called the Gizoid. However, Eggman uderestimated the robot's power and was defeated again, but not before the robot went insane and nearly blew up the Earth.

Another time, Eggman breeched the Space-Time Continuum and met his descendant from 200 years into the future, Dr. Eggman NEGA. Upon doing so, the two tried to cooperate to bring both the future and the present together using the powers of both the Chaos and Sol Emeralds. However, they were not only just beaten by Sonic, but also by the gaurdian of the Sol Emeralds, Blaze the Cat. After that, time and space were repaired and Blaze and NEGA returned to the future.

After thinking about his past defeats, Eggman came to a realization: "For too long I've relied on outside sources... They do bring me close to my goal, yet they always end up nearly destroying the planet!"

Eggman thought about Metal Sonic. The reason that robot went insane and broke free of Eggman's control was that he had been neglecting his most prized creation in recent years. He also pieced together a similar issue when it came to E-123 Omega, whom Eggman had decomissioned before that particular E-Series droid was able to see his first battle. Eggman knew from experiance afterwards that this lead to Omega's rebellion. As such, he figured Metal Sonic had felt the same way. But for obvious reasons, Metal's thirst for killing made him far more dangerous than Eggman himself.

Looking into a nearby stasis capsule, Eggman saw his strongest robot deactivated and lifeless inside the fluid-filled tube.

Eggman then said out loud to himself, "Metal only came close to defeating Sonic due to my choice to make him the fastest machine ever built... If I want to destroy Sonic, I gotta try to match Sonic's speed again. But this time, I can't afford to make the same mistake I've made with my past projects, as well as Metal... What do I do?"

As Eggman continued to think, he recalled something he read in an online news paper a few years ago. There was apparently a very fast animal living in the desert, whom supposedly could match the speed of Sonic the Hedgehog. This animal had eluded capture from a would-be predetor for nearly sixty years.

Eggman smiled wickedly as a plan began to form. He then said, "I guess it's time to fire up the old roboticizer!"

-------------------

In the middle of the Arizona desert, there were two blurs moving at very high speed. One was a mix of brown, light-blue, and purple while the other was all brown. Suddenly, the action stops revealing what the two figures were.

One was an osterich-like bird with brown legs and feet, light-blue feathers on it's neck, tail, and body. And purple feathers on it's head and wings. Underneath the bird, a few words pop up, saying:

**Road Runner **

**(Speedicus Demonicus)**

The other blur revealed itself to be an anthromorphic coyote with yellow eyes, dark brown fur all over it's body except on it's muzzle, chest, belly, and the inside of it's ears which were covered in a light grayish-brown fur. Like the Road Runner, under the coyote appeared the words:

**Coyote **

**(Slobberi Idioticus)**

Suddenly, the captions under the two animals vanish, and the action resumes. Suddenly, the Road Runner turns it's head and say, "BEEP BEEP!!!" before running off at an impossibly high speed, leaving a trail of fire behind it. The coyote stops in his tracks, and ponders for a moment before heading off screen to think up a plan.

When the Coyote left, fat, belligerent, Dr. Eggman appeared in his famed Egg-O-Matic. As soon as he's in view, the following caption appears:

**Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik **

**(Ovumgutius Neverlearningus)**

When the caption vanishes, Eggman says, "Ok, that bird should be here somewhere..."

Eggman didn't notice the Road Runner come up behind him, and shout, "BEEP BEEP!!!" Resulting in Eggman jumping straight out of his seat, and landing face first in the sreet below. The Road Runner stuck it's tounge out before running off at high speed. Afterwards, Eggman got up and began walking away from his ship to think about what to do about his new project.

From a distance, the Coyote saw the evil genius, Dr. Eggman, and thought, _'I know him... He's the evil genius, Dr. Eggman... A brilliant scientist gone bad when his prized invention, the roboticizer ended up being called an atrocity to scientific world. Eggman seems to be after my old rival for some reason... If Eggman gets his hands on the Road Runner, my life-long dream of that fantastic Road Runner dinner will be shattered! I got to see what that fat tub of lard is up to...'_

The Coyote waited as he saw he bad doctor wander off, likely to set a trap for the elusive bird. The Coyote snuck into Eggman's Egg-O-Matic, and found a crude, but simple to understand to-do list.

1: Go to desert

2: Find Road Runner

3: Catch and robotocize Road Runner

4: Use the new Mecha-Road Runner to catch Sonic the Hedgehog and destroy him once and for all!!!

5: **WORLD DOMINATION, BABY!!!!!!!!!!**

The Coyote, now knowing what the mad man was up to, quickly made a few "modifications" to the Egg-O-Matic and then slinked away as to not be seen by the mad doctor.

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Eggman was now in his Egg-O-Matic, and was ready to begin his plan to capture the Road Runner. From a safe distance, Wiley E. Coyote was watching Eggman.

Finally, the Road Runner appeared, running down the lonely desert road at high speed. Eggman began his pirsuit of the speedy bird. The Road Runner saw his new playmate, and thought, _'There's that guy again. I wonder who he is?'_

The Road Runner's question was answered when a panel in the front of the Egg-O-Matic opened up, revealing a mechanical hand that reached out for the Road Runner. The Road Runner smirked, and thought, _'Oh goody! A human version of Wiley!'_

The Road Runner found a stretch of road that crossed over a gorge, but the bridge linking the two pieces of road was out. However, the Road Runner was able to defy gravity and ran right across the gorge.

Seeing this, Eggman thought, _'He just ran over thin air! I gotta study this bird before I roboticize him!'_

As the Egg-O-Matic passed over the broken bridge, his machine suddenly plummeted downward, taking the obese scientist with it, screaming all the way until a loud crash was heard on the desert floor below.

The Road Runner, for the first time ever, was stumped by what had happened. The fat man's machine was flying, so how did it just fall down like that? The Road Runner decided not to dwell on the subject, and ran off. Wiley E. Coyote's laughter could be heard in the desert air as the Road Runner departed.

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After fixing the Egg-O-Matic after it's sudden fall, Eggman decided simply chasing the Road Runner wouldn't do him any good.

"Apparently, this bird is somehow able to warp reality... It forced my ship to suddenly shut down halfway across that chasm, resulting in my fall. I guess I'd better go with the traps then."

Wiley E. Coyote overheard Eggman's musings, and silently laughed as Eggman hadn't found out about his tampering with the Egg-O-Matic.

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Eggman's next plan was simple enough; Attract the bird via birdseed, and knock it out with a tranquilizer dart.

The coyote, familiar with this trick, decided to do something about Eggman's tranquilizer rifle. While Eggman wasn't looking, Wiley moved the rear end of the tranquilizer rifle to the front end, then left it in the exact position where he found it before skulking away.

When Eggman returned and picked up his rifle, the Road Runner had stopped to eat the bird seed as expected. Eggman tried to shoot the Road Runner, but due to Wiley's interference, Eggman shot himself instead, putting himself to sleep.

the Road Runner finished his meal, and continued running down the road.

---------

Dr. Eggman decided to take a more direct approach this time, and built a missle launcher. Thankfully for Wiley, this particular missle launcher was similar in design to one he bought from the ACME company once before, and switched the blueprints.

Eggman got in position, and said to himself, "This time, I CAN'T fail! This missle will home in on that buzzard no matter where he goes, and will launch a capture net when it gets close enough to the Road Runner!!!"

What Eggman didn't notice while he was gloating was Wiley had switched the missle with the built-in net with an identical missle equipped with the standard exploding warhead before running off again.

When the Road Runner zoomed down the road, Eggman activated the missle, which took off after the Road Runner as expected. However, the Road Runner took a sharp turn, causing the missle to fly without a set target. The missle's sensors only picked up one target anywhere near it and that was Eggman. The missle turned and flew back to Eggman who had a look of absolute terror on his face before the missle went off.

In the distance, Wiley was eating popcorn as he watched the missle explode some five hundred yards away.

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Eggman had had enough. He decided to put an end to that bird here and now as he set up explosives of various kinds all along the road, laughing madly as he went on with his work. Finally, his job was done, and he proceeded to set the bombs off when he heard a familiar "BEEP BEEP" in the distance. He was in for a rude awakening as the beeps came from a moving truck that ran right over Eggman.

Dazed from the impact with the truck, Eggman fell on top of the plunger on the detonator and blew himself up.

When the smoke cleared, a charred, blackened, and wobbly Dr. Eggman slowly got up. Eggman stuck his tounge out, and said, "BEEP BEEP!" before falling flat on his face, unconcious.

Inside the truck, the driver, or I should say drivers, were none other than both Wiley E. Coyote and the Road Runner, who began laughing at the mad doctor's failed schemes.

Wiley held up a sign to the Road Runner which said, **It feels good to be on the winning side for a change!**

The Road Runner simply nodded in agreement.

**Th-th-th-that's All, Folks!!!!!**

* * *

There you have it, my vision of what would happen if the guys from Warner Bros should ever provide characters and plotlines for the Sonic series. I hope you've enjoyed reading this as much as I had writing it. Later!


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